if a strange man comes to the door 
when you’re alone in the house
greet him with a shotgun
and don’t lower the barrel
until he claims kin

when he claims kin
he’ll tell you who he’s related to
if you don’t recognize the names
back for at least 3 generations
turn him away

if he asks where your neighbors live
say you never heard of them
if asks how to get somewhere
send him in the wrong direction

never kill a garter snake
never steal pennies off the eyes
of a corpse

when sharing your favorite recipe
always leave out one ingredient